March 29th 2026

Digital Journal Entry

Hello world!

Today is a weird day. I just came from several days of work, and I feel pretty fine about it. To be honest I did feel really good. Work is pretty fulfilling, and all the people I work with are absolutely fantastic. It’s nice, even when it’s tough, to be with great people. I have a few days off now though, which is nice, and it gives me time to do some random bits and chores. Today I did some deep cleaning of my flat, in preparation for my landlord to visit tomorrow to take some photos. The cleaning was fine, but then I saw my flat in almost the exact same state as when I moved in, and it made me think about a lot.

I define my life in chapters, usually on education, then on jobs. My primary school chapter, my high school chapter (and second high school chapter), then the college chapter. After that, my life basically revolved around working in bars. I define a chapter at the first proper dive bar I worked at, where I learned all my skills and formed long-lasting friendships, and then I define the chapter after that which was the music venue I currently work at. My current chapter lines almost right up with when I moved into my flat. I’ve been here for two years, and I was wondering what has happened here and what has changed about myself.

I moved into the flat and since then I’ve made a lot of friendships, and (hopefully) no enemies. That’s always a good sign. I think I’ve managed to navigate away from any drama. That’s one of the main reasons I couldn’t deal with anyone at my university, because every time I was in a lecture with someone, I could always hear gossip about someone else. It was so annoying. Also just a waste of time.

I surround myself with such brilliant and amazing people, and it’s going to be one of the hardest moments of my life to say goodbye to them all. Anyway, that’s depressing.

I was thinking, while cleaning, about what I’ve learned about myself since I started this chapter of my life, and as it nearly closes, and it’s that I don’t think I’ve learned much at all. I don’t know what makes me really happy, but I am only twenty three. I’ve got time to figure it out. I like writing, and telling stories, and that feeds into the need to travel and explore. That’s why Japan is for me, because it’s obviously so distant and foreign to me, but also their public transport is so good/cheap that I can constantly explore. It’s a good balance. On the other hand, I worry that I will get there, settle in, and then get bored of it, like how I feel in my current place. I remember two years ago, my big plan was to settle into my flat, and properly settle down. I had moved places every year for around five years, and I just wanted a place to call my own. I’d fully decorate with posters and figurines and stay here for a long long time, but obviously that didn’t happen. I think I originally felt like it was just an itch to go on holiday, but it kept feeling like a much bigger itch. I was always thinking of leaving my flat from the very beginning. Right now I wonder whether it’s just the place I’m at now, or whether I’ve got some innate desire to travel and wander. Maybe I’m just some nomad who’s destined to travel.

Or I’m just twenty three, and I want to get something out of my system while I still can.

This is such a weird journal entry. My life feels weird, and I’m doing a lot of reminiscing, but I continue to stay excited and ready for the next chapter.

Thanks for reading.